We talked in class about how one of Kochan’s main problems
is his disconnect from other people, and his belief that he is different and
everyone else is the same. I’ve been wondering if his inability to relate to
people is because he thinks he already knows he can’t fit in. Because he “knows”
that everyone else is normal, and he “knows” that he is special and separate,
he can’t figure out how to fit in. When everyone else his age was worried about
fitting in, growing up, and their development of a sexual identity, Kochan was
moping around already knowing the answers to life’s questions. He enjoyed his
dark inner world too much to realize just how much of his reality he had made
up to fit his tragederian aesthetics. Ironically he missed out on the
self-discovery phase of development because he was too busy reinforcing his
immature conclusions and reflecting on how much smarter and more mature than
his peers he considered himself. In a
cruel twist of fate, this troubled, lonely, self-doubting guy was perhaps done
in by his haughty, erroneous conclusions.
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